I have been feeling like I am working on getting sick for about a week now. On Friday, it blew up. Sinus issues, congestion, sore throat. Starting Thursday, I started having some pain on my right hand lower side. I thought it was a pulled muscle or something. Friday night I started getting some pressure-like cramping. Saturday, along with being sick, the cramping got so bad that I called the OB's on-call doctor, who said to go ahead and go to the ER, just to make sure everything was okay. The checked on Bug first, his or her heartbeat was perfect, in the 150's. They did a urine sample, everything came back normal. They did a pelvic and ran tests in that general area, everything was healthy. Finally, while waiting on some result, it dawned on me....my cyst. So, I mentioned that at my last ultrasound, the OB noticed a rather large cyst on my ovary. They weren't concerned as it is very normal, especially in pregnancy (and often aides in pregnancy.) So then, they wanted to do an ultrasound to check on the cyst. The thing they were concerned about was the cyst flopping over and twisting my ovary, cutting off the blood supply and essentially killing my right ovary.
The ultrasound took quite some time, but I didn't mind seeing Bug for a good 45 minutes. The tech was avoiding any "crotch shot" angles, but I think I might have seen the gender. Both Liam and I think the same thing, but because it was very quick, we aren't telling anyone what we think until our Anatomy Scan on the 2nd. (So soon!) We also saw 4 chambers on the heart, which was pretty cool. No longer a little flicker, the heart was a pumpin' away. Bug was measuring right on track, only the head was measuring almost a week ahead! Gunna have Daddy's big head. Poor Mommy....
When we went back into our room, the doctor came (30 minutes later) and told us everything looked great. My cyst was gone, so they think it ruptured, which is what would be causing the pain. OR it receded, but before receding, it leaked some fluid, causing the pain. She said Bug look perfect (DUH.) They sent me home with instructions to rest and take a half a Vicodin for the pain.
I took the Vicodin that night to help me sleep, but it made me nauseous- so I am not going to take it anymore. Also, when I take it, I can't take the medicine for my cold, which is miserable. I would rather lay and rest for the cyst and be able to breathe. :)
Anyways, back to the stress part. I have been trying to write this paper (due tomorrow) all day, and I just can't think right. The cold meds are making me loopy, the cyst is making me sick, I am going crazy. I think I can do it- it is only a 2 pg paper about an interesting subject. The class is decently hard, but okay, and I like it. The prof. emailed me back today and told me not to worry too much about my attendance grade because she knows my participation in class has been great. She also gave me a list of some extra credit options. My other class is WAY hard, prof. still hasn't emailed me back, and the paper due on Thursday, I don't even know what she is expecting....There is no option for extra credit. I don't know that I am or have the motivation to even pass that class anymore.
Next term, it is looking like we might have to pay out of pocket for some of my tuition, along with the fact that I just don't know if I want to go back fall term, and how miserable this pregnancy has been, I might not be going next term.
I am just in a place where I want to give up. I feel like all week I was trying to keep my head up and try to keep a good attitude, which made me ignore all the signs my body was giving me to slow down. I feel like I am trying to keep up with Superwoman and it just isn't working. I can't exactly choose to not be pregnant anymore, but school IS something I can let go of. I just don't know.
Experts claim that children born to mothers who are highly stressed during pregnancy exhibit genetic changes that may make them more vulnerable to stress themselves. Clearly I need to do this:
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